Dancing in the rain

Dancing in the rain

It’s tough to enjoy life when it seems like the circumstances surrounding you are choking the very life out of you. You try to lift your head out of the “waters” just so you can take a breath but you are pushed down deeper by the waves that seem to overtake you. That’s when you have to learn to “dance in the rain”.

I have felt that way so many times in my life and i remember simply asking God for an adventure a couple of months ago. A part of me felt suppressed and i found myself just going through the motions of life. I knew I needed God to shake things up a little for me and He did!

The past 2 months have been like a spiritual boot camp where I have been stretched to closer lean into God and His strength that is perfect in my weakness. Sometimes life throws at us situations that force us to “toughen up”, in the meantime forgetting the joy of being childlike before God. Volunteering with Hope Mission summer kids’s camp put in a new perspective for me, simply looking at life through the eyes of a child. All a child knows is what they have been taught and exposed to, they may not even have an idea of what is wrong or right, or even that their view of life is skewed. Through this journey I had to learn a lot of patience and humility not just towards the kids that were entrusted to me each week, but also towards myself. To allow God to do a work in my life as my own weaknesses were exposed.Our minds can become so conditioned by what life has brought our way, the pain, hurts and disappointments become deeply engraved in our soul, we slowly “lose” the freedom Christ purchased for us. And boy did i encounter a lot of brokenness in these kids! It was really an opportunity to open myself up to God’s abundant grace and allow it to flow in my life and through to the kids. I could identify with their brokenness and reach out to them and at the same time learn to be like them in their innocence and free expression. Life is rarely perfect and the enemy will always look for subtle ways to sneak into your soul. You have the right to choose what you allow in to stay.

I think its so important to do a soul search often and allow God’s truth to expose every lie the enemy plants in the soil of our hearts that we may not even be aware of. Every season no matter how bad it may look or feel is an opportunity to experience God’s healing rain as we learn to dance to His tune of freedom!

Psalm 139:23
“Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.”

PERFECTION REPUTATION

PERFECTION REPUTATION

Wendy grabbed a banana from her dining table before she took one last peek at herself in the mirror that hang on the wall. She didn’t feel as good as she thought she looked. “Just a little more blush and lipstick and I might just nail the perfect executive look,” she thought, she unconsciously muttered the words under her breath. She felt a bit panicky at the fact that she was running late and would not beat the morning traffic to get to her presentation on time. The thought of impatient and skeptical clients waiting in her office lounge almost made her miss a step as she rushed out her door and into her car.

After what seemed like an eternity of driving like a maniac, speeding through a red light and attracting some onlookers with screeching tires, Wendy “professionally” burst through the door of the elegant glass building that she shared with another law firm. Another source of her stress, she just couldn’t afford the high rentals anymore. She quickly dismissed the thought as her secretary looked up from her desk and strutted towards her with her usual cup of coffee. She could sense the anxiety and panic that Sara so sleekly tried to hide. She understood why. Mr. Burns was one of their biggest clients who could easily send her consultancy business crashing to the ground if he pulled out.
“Thanks Sara,” she took a sip of her black coffee and winced before swallowing hard, trying her best to keep calm. The coffee tasted a bit stronger than the usual. Was this Sara’s way of letting her know that she would need a stronger dose to get her through that moment? She had no time to contemplate. “How long has he been waiting?
“About half an hour. He has threatened to leave at least twice.”
“Great.” Wendy said in between gritted teeth and straightened her jacket a little more as she walked towards an angry looking Mr. Burns. “Prayers please.”
Sara nodded understandably. She sometimes struggled with drawing the line between how much of Wendy’s life she should be involved with and what she should let pass. Despite the fact that Sara had introduced Wendy to her unshakable faith in Jesus, she was significantly younger and less “experienced” with life. However, she often resisted the urge to literally knock some sense into her older compatriot who seemed to struggle with the “Perfection Reputation”. “PR” as she and her girlfriends often referred to it. Not that she didn’t struggle with it herself, but she knew how to detect it the moment it threatened to set in.

* * * * * * * * * * * * ** * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

How often do we mentally set a measuring line or stick for ourselves by which we think or feel we are “Right” with God? Whoever told us that we would always feel as we truly are? The world…society, family or our demanding careers? Just the thought of it brings so much pressure. There is truly no set method by which we should condition ourselves to just be who we truly are. The only strategy we should live by is walking by the Spirit of the Lord. I find that sometimes what worked last week to get me back on track when I feel inadequate as a child of God may not work for another moment. I have to tune in to my relationship with Jesus and listen for His direction. If there was one automatic method available, I think there would be little effort in our relationship with Christ when that is the number one thing for Him, to constantly relate with Him to see who we are and how we should live.

“So don’t you see that we don’t owe this old do-it-yourself life one red cent. There’s nothing in it for us, nothing at all. The best thing to do is give it a decent burial and get on with your new life. God’s Spirit beckons. There are things to do and places to go!” (Romans 8:12-14) MSG

* * * * * * * * * ** * * * * * * * ** * * * * ** * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Sara hesitated at Wendy’s door before she knocked lightly. She could hear the silent sniffles on the other side of the door. When she didn’t get a response, she let herself in slowly as she approached Wendy’s desk with a box of clinex in hand. Wendy didn’t lift her head from her desk but continued to sob helplessly.
“It couldn’t have been that bad Wendy,” Sara said comfortingly.
Wendy lifted up her head slightly, make-up smudged all over her face. Sara had never seen her like this before, she smiled at the thought of Wendy’s beauty even with the “imperfection”. She admired her strength and personality in a lot of ways that Wendy didn’t give herself credit for.
“Did you pray hard enough? Because it didn’t work! I am totally failing at everything,” she managed in between sobs.
Sara handed her the clinex as she faithfully took it and blew her snot-filled nose.
“You try too hard,” Sara caught herself saying before she could think twice. Wendy raised an eyebrow and for a moment Sara wasn’t sure what the response would be.
Sara’s voice was calm and comforting so much that Wendy couldn’t argue with it. She gave up any protest and instead sighed.
“How do you do it?” She said as a statement rather than a question. “You seem to always have it together.”
Sara smiled and shrugged her shoulders. “Maybe I’m just good at holding it in, my default since I was a child. I struggle just like any other person but God has taught me to give Him my burdens which I really have no business carrying.”
“See that!” Wendy managed a smile through the tears. She actually felt a weight lift off for the first time in a long time. She felt happy and relieved that Sara had found her in such a vulnerable state where she could receive that flicker of hope. “Thank you.”

The Word Opens Up Encounters

The Word Opens Up Encounters

I love it!

LiifeTree: equipping in identity, spirituals, mental health, healing, wonder...

By faith we inherit…Therefore inheriting the promises is the outcome of faith and depends entirely on faith, in order that it might be given as an act of grace, to make it stable and valid and guarenteed to all his descendants… Romans 4 (Amplified).

Grace, Faith and Promise

By grace through a promise we receive. Takes a load of performance pressure off doesn’t it? Whatever point of our journey, God is anticipating using our experiences as opportunities to reveal Himself to us that we might know Him- not just doctrinally, but experientially. One of my favorite things is noticing a verse or paragraph and then experientially understanding it, or having some encounter with God and then finding a verse that affirms it. This is a story about that. Encountering God experientially after meditating on a passage of scripture for a time- Romans 4.

Singing a Love Song

I love to…

View original post 1,236 more words

The Sizzling Teapot

The Sizzling Teapot

As I sit here sipping on my tea and savoring in God’s goodness, I am amazed at how God can completely calm the “raging sea’” of emotions in my soul as easily as flipping a coin..one moment I feel so anxious and fearful and the next this flood of peace and gratitude sizzles up from the inside and I just want to share it and make someone else’s day better and filled with love. In that moment of anxiety and “unsettledness” I had to make the choice to run to God and not allow the negative feelings to overwhelm me..that’s when the shift happened..the flip.. God’s love, support, healing and provision is in full supply and He is always ready to fully deliver as we reach out to Him like little kids who have such faith and trust in their Daddy that it has already been taken care of! Sometimes it will mean constantly exposing that weak area of your life to God’s Grace and Truth until the settledness comes in by the Spirit of the Lord. Peace, Love, joy cannot be conjured up by our “hard efforts” but it means intentionally soaking in God’s Truth and His Spirit as you wait in His presence. God wants us to fully operate at our best, spirit, soul and body and for His gifts in us to be daily stirred up by His Spirit.

I have this picture in my mind right now of a teapot on a hot stove sizzling full force with steam as water boils inside it.

I believe as we are daily in touch with the heat of His presence, His Love and Glory (the stove), the spirit of God (the water) produces such a force, an evidence of His work in us (the teapot) that is visible and tangible on the outside (the steam). We can daily be in touch with who we truly are and express that to the world. In the past few days I have felt God placing such a sense on my heart to stir up again the gifts on the inside of me. To not be afraid to be in touch with my passions that I may even have put aside consciously or unconsciously, allowed to be buried so deep, I became out of touch with them. One of them is actually writing. I have always enjoyed writing since I was very young. I remember sitting at a computer at home in my junior high school days writing stories and not wanting to move even when I was called for meals. Recently, a friend of mine Katia shared with me how she always loved painting when she was little but somehow had allowed that passion to fade as the years went by. I watched her marvel and all giddy as we drove past a buck (deer), a beautiful sunset and water running under a bridge. We laughed as she resisted everything in her power to not stop and take pictures. God had been stirring it up in her again and she was making steps to paint again. There is such an amazing message in that. If each of us can be in touch with the dreams and passions that God purposefully put in us, we will find that joy and fulfillment in expressing those gifts in love to others. It doesn’t matter how young or old you may be, there are such treasures deeply buried in you that want to find their way out to be expressed to the world ,adding to the marvel and beauty of God’s creation. The more we use and express them, the more they grow and are perfected and actually brighten another person’s life. This reminds me of the parable of the talents in the bible where one servant was so afraid he buried his one gift and ended up losing it all. For the other servant with 5 talents, he wisely invested them and not only got back what he invested but was also given the extra one that the other servant lost! I will let you further ponder over that with the help of the Holy Spirit. The enemy wants to use fear, the busyness of life and various distractions to stifle the gifts of God in you but trust me there is no excuse big enough to allow him to! We are stewards of the gifts and callings of God, and so as I challenge myself to stir up the gifts in me again, I invite you to this challenge as well 